The Knight Before Christmas is clearly propaganda funded by Big Hot Chocolate.
Me constantly: *Hears about a researcher tangentially related to my interests*
*Instantly orders a used copy of their book*
Two hours later: *Remembers I pay Scribd money every month so I will stop doing that*
“You’d think I’d learn.”
Every year there is that one beautiful day in late November when I remember that Holiday Grapes exist.